Searching for Marriage Counselors Specializing in Communication? Important Considerations
How do I find qualified marriage counselors in my area who specialize in communication issues?
You’re looking for qualified marriage counselors in your area who specialize in communication issues. This is a common and understandable goal when a marriage is facing difficulties. After all, many believe that if couples could just communicate better, their problems would disappear.
However, drawing on the insights of Dr. Lee Baucom, a veteran of marriage therapy and relationship coaching for over 30 years, it’s important to consider a broader perspective on marital challenges. While improved communication is often a desired outcome in marriage counseling, Dr. Baucom suggests that communication problems are frequently a symptom of deeper underlying issues, such as misperceptions and a lack of emotional connection.
Dr. Baucom, known for his Save the Marriage System, contends that traditional couple therapy often operates on the assumption that better communication skills will automatically lead to a healthier relationship. However, he cautions that simply teaching communication techniques without addressing the fundamental misperceptions within the relationship might only make couples more adept at arguing. As he puts it, communication is like plumbing – if it’s connected to a clean source (accurate perception), it delivers fresh water, but if connected to a sewer (misperceptions), it delivers something harmful.
Instead of solely focusing on communication, Dr. Baucom’s approach emphasizes understanding the deeper emotional and psychological dynamics at play in a marriage. He believes that fostering empathy, emotional connection, and a long-term commitment are more crucial than just resolving surface-level conflicts through communication techniques. His Save the Marriage System is designed to help couples repair their marriages by addressing these deeper issues.
It’s also important to note Dr. Baucom’s belief that change can begin even if only one partner is willing to work on the marriage. This is a key differentiator from traditional therapy models that often require both partners to be actively engaged from the outset.
So, while you are searching for counselors specializing in communication, here are some things to consider based on Dr. Baucom’s perspective:
- Think beyond just communication skills: Consider whether the communication issues are masking deeper feelings of disconnection, hurt, or misperception.
- Look for counselors who address emotional connection: A therapist who focuses on building empathy and understanding the emotional underpinnings of your relationship might be more effective in the long run.
- Consider alternative approaches: Dr. Baucom’s Save the Marriage System, including his online programs, podcasts, and books like How to Save Your Marriage in 3 Simple Steps and Save the Marriage, offer a different path to improving your marriage that goes beyond traditional communication-focused therapy. He also provides relationship coaching.
- Remember that one person can initiate change: Even if your partner is hesitant to seek counseling, you can begin working on the relationship yourself using resources like Dr. Baucom’s.
In conclusion, while finding a counselor who specializes in communication might seem like the direct solution, Dr. Baucom’s insights suggest that addressing the deeper relational dynamics could lead to more sustainable improvements in your marriage, naturally enhancing communication as a result of increased understanding and connection. Therefore, consider a broader search that includes therapists who focus on the foundational aspects of your relationship in addition to or instead of solely communication skills.
