Feeling Lost in Your Marriage? Here’s Where to Find Guidance

Where can I get marriage guidance to help us through this tough time?

Going through a tough time in your marriage can feel incredibly isolating and overwhelming. You’re not alone, and thankfully, there are resources available to help you navigate these challenges and potentially rebuild a stronger connection. If you’re asking yourself, “Where can I get marriage guidance to help us through this tough time?”, this post is for you.

Many couples instinctively turn to traditional marriage therapy when difficulties arise. However, it’s important to understand that most marriage therapists are not specifically trained in marriage counseling. They often apply techniques learned in individual therapy, which may not be effective for the unique dynamics of a troubled marriage. In fact, the success rate of traditional marriage counseling is reported to be quite low, around only 20%. Some even suggest that “Marital Therapy” can be destructive to your situation.

Perhaps you’ve already tried therapy, self-help books, or seminars without seeing the desired changes. This doesn’t mean your situation is hopeless. It might simply mean you haven’t found the right approach yet.

One potential avenue for guidance comes from Lee H. Baucom, Ph.D., a relationship coach and marriage expert. Dr. Baucom developed the “Save The Marriage SYSTEM” based on his experience and the limitations he saw in traditional methods. This system is presented as a step-by-step guide available online.

Here’s what the “Save The Marriage SYSTEM” and related resources offer as potential sources of marriage guidance:

• “The Save The Marriage SYSTEM”: This is described as a comprehensive, multi-module system available in an electronic, downloadable format. It aims to provide the “unique, different and (most importantly) effective secrets” Dr. Baucom discovered in his practice. The system includes modules designed to help you:
  • Avoid common mistakes when a crisis arises.
  • Assess the specific stage of your marriage crisis (identifying 8 distinct paths).
  • Follow a path to recovery tailored to your stage of crisis.
  • Understand the “real secret of marriage” and what gets in the way.
  • Learn a step-by-step method for rebuilding your marriage.
  • Understand why “hard work” and “traditional” marriage counseling might not be the answer.
• Bonus Materials: The system often includes bonus audio recordings and ebooks on specific topics like coping with a mid-life marriage crisis, recovering from an affair, rules for fair fighting, and inspiring stories of couples who saved their marriages.
• Relationship Coaching: Dr. Baucom and his team offer relationship coaching via telephone for more direct assistance. This can be done from anywhere.
• Save the Marriage Teleclasses: These are periodic phone seminars on the ideas presented in the “Save The Marriage” approach.
• Recommended Resources: Dr. Baucom also suggests exploring other books and resources for further learning about yourself and your marriage, such as “The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work” by John Gottman and “Women, Men & Money” by William Francis Devine.

Dr. Baucom emphasizes that his approach works even if only one spouse is initially interested in saving the marriage. He views a marriage as a system, where a change in one part can influence the whole.

He also highlights the importance of shifting your thinking about marriage. Instead of focusing solely on communication skills (which he believes can just make fighting more effective), his approach delves into misperceptions, moving from “You & Me” to “WE”, finding the “North Star” of your relationship (like commitment), and understanding the stages of a marital crisis.

If you’re feeling lost and looking for guidance, consider exploring the resources offered within the “Save The Marriage” framework. It presents an alternative to traditional therapy, focusing on practical strategies and a unique understanding of marital dynamics. You can find more information and potentially access the “Save The Marriage SYSTEM” online. Remember, taking action is crucial, as neglecting the issues can worsen the situation over time.